As a single parent in my 30s, I don’t feel I can be as carefree about falling in love or getting into a relationship as I was in my teens and twenties.
It’s no longer just about feelings and lust – there are so many other factors involved in my choosing a partner because my son’s future is at stake too.
If he or she only wants you to come over and have sex with him, that's not a great indicator that he or she likes you for who you are and wants to spend time with you because you're smart and interesting. Why do you even want a relationship with this person, anyways? Great sex isn't a reason to get involved in a full-fledged relationship, and the comfort that comes with seeing someone regularly is also not a reason. If he or she is a mature human being, they'll be able to handle a conversation about what is going on between the two of you.
Make a list of pros and cons to help you clarify what it actually is that you want — and if it's this person or not. Don't pressure them about it, and don't go all '80s romcom on them with crazy declarations of love.
So, that begs the question — how do you push your summer fling into an actual relationship? But if you've been dating or seeing each other for a few months, it's time to broach the social media sea.
If you aren't Facebook or Instagram friends, add him or her and see what happens.
So we may end up in this weird area in between hookups and relationships. I want to know if I can text someone whenever I want without looking like a stage-five clinger, and I want to know that I don't necessarily need to make weekend plans because I'll be with him.
Most of all, I want to be able to assume that I'm going to see him and hear from him regularly without feeling like I'm totally mentally unhinged.
Despite my thinking he’d end things, my hesitation didn’t scare him off. He was willing to continue being exclusive without being able to call me his girlfriend yet.
Though I’ve been completely open to investing my heart and time in quality men that I meet, my first reaction to hearing the word “girlfriend” too soon is to cringe – or even worse, RUN.
I’ve seen other women get giddy over being in a serious relationship, but for me, as a single mom, that’s where things get complicated.
Without even realizing it, the desire to fall in love again had crept back into my life.
I no longer wanted to be alone, and found myself wanting something more serious than my usual flings, but just because I was ready to seriously date didn’t mean I was ready for a serious relationship. To me, seriously dating someone means I’m not sleeping, making out with, or seeing anyone else.